Let's Talk About Words

    " Humanity is just a work in progress."                                                    -Tennessee Williams    I read the newspaper; I see the news on TV, and I hear what is happening in the world around me. I am often shocked and disheartened by much of what I hear and see, but I am an optimist by nature. I believe in the best from others; I believe that the world is a great place to live; I believe in mankind . Although I have experienced and witnessed sadness as well as evil, in my own life as well as the lives of others firsthand, I am still full of hope. For every story I read or hear, I notice one of people helping. There are so many organizations and people working to make this a better world to live in, to help others and to make a difference.  We can each improve ourselves individually, but what a...

   "What if you woke up today with only the things that you thanked God for yesterday?" When I googled this quote I found numerous discussions about it as well as various plaques and items to purchase with this quote. I am disappointed in myself to admit that when think about what I would have woke up with today, it would have been nothing. Zero. Zilch. Nada. I have read that a parent or teacher should notice and comment when children are getting along and to refrain from only interceding when they fight, to diminish the attention given to the negative behavior. Expressing gratitude is similar to that for me. I talk and pray to God when negative situations occur, but what about when my life is going smoothly?  I do remember to s ay thank you when something really fabulous happens,   but what about the every day people and situations? Thank you God for the  crisp fall air. Thank you God for a good day at work. Thank you God for a smile from my daug...

"...true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within."                                                             -Elisabeth Kubler-Ross    My interpretation of this quote would be once again referring to a person's soul . I believe that we are all powerful souls that take the form of a human body to learn and experience life. While we are living our life here on Earth, we encounter different situations and circumstances. It is quite easy to be happy and positive when we are confronted with pleasant or joyful people and experiences. What about difficult ones like illness, abuse, or even just a mean person? Can we keep our inner light , or our soul , shining brightly or does it waver and dim? My light definitely weakens  since I often struggle to see the positive in negative situations a...

      Norman Cousins said, "The individual is capable of both great compassion and great indifference." When I started volunteering at WINGS years ago, I attended a two hour training to understand the women and children staying in the home that I would be volunteering at. As I saw the slide show and listened to the woman speak, I realized that if it had not been for my mother's help, I could have found myself homeless and without a job when I got divorced in 2001. Even though I had a Bachelor's Degree in Psychology, I had not worked in 9 years plus my daughters were only 5, 7 and 9 at the time. I had no money saved and received very little child support. I learned that these women were not on drugs or trying to get free food and shelter. They did not have anyone to help them watch their children; they did not have the money to buy a car to be able to drive to a job. It was a vicious cycle of lacking causing more lacking. In a world where we hear story after story ...

       "Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower."                                                                      -Albert Camus      What does Albert Camus mean by this quote? Flowers are perceived to be beautiful, therefore my simplified interpretation would be that the color changes of the leaves in the fall are as the flowers are in the spring. Spring is thought of as a renewal and rebirth of nature; whereas Autumn is a breaking down and preparation for the dark, cold winter.  To look deeper into the comparisons to life,  t here are different seasons in one's lives as there are changes of seasons in weather, although not near as predictable. There are the wonderful times in life when everything is new and fresh and life is pa...

   "You are a powerful spirit that has come to earth to learn."                                                              - Gary Zukav in Seat of the Soul             If you believe this quote as I do, then you must spend time alone to hear the yearnings of your soul , to understand all that you are here to learn.  Your inner being or soul speaks to you through feelings and emotions. We sometimes get lost in our heads, trying to think or reason our way out of a problem. I think that is important to do when confronted with a problem or decision, but some time should be spent not thinking, just quieting your mind. I have read that our minds are a person's personality talking whereas your soul speaks to you in those moments you stop the thoughts of your mind. I have tried medita...

     Ralph Waldo Emerson was quoted as saying, "Earth laughs in flowers." My sister, Amy, and I went hiking yesterday at Crabtree Nature Center in Barrington Hills. As we walked, I took picture after picture of all of the beauty that I saw. I have lived in this area for 12 years and never even knew that this place was nearby. I am grateful that others before me had the wisdom to preserve these parts of our planet for us and for future generations to enjoy. People blame others for the destructive of our planet. They accuse construction companies for all of the new buildings and the clearing away of the trees or condemn big businesses for the destruction of our ozone layer with pollution. It is easy to cast blame on others, but what is our role in taking care of our planet Earth? We can be involved in our government if we choose, but we can also use these forest preserves and nature centers that were kept for us. It was a beautiful day, and many schools had the...

     Carl Reiner's quote is, "The absolute truth is the thing that makes people laugh." He is a comedian, writer, actor and Emmy winner. Humor is interjected into some of the more difficult situations in television shows, movies and books. Those are the ones that I can relate to because even as I cry, I can also laugh. I laugh with, not at, the mistakes of others. I smile as a way of understanding, sharing and connecting because we all have hardships and struggles in our lives. My first fiction book that I am writing  Riding Waves is about a young woman trying to find her way in life, balancing her needs with the challenges of a new relationship. It has dark moments, but even during those times, there is humor. There is laughter to her story just like in life. Often while sharing a story with someone about something bad that happened to me, I instantly feel better and can even begin to see the humor. Sometimes when the day just keeps getting wor...

                                       How do you approach life? My quote today asks if you take chances or do you play it safe? If you are like me, some areas of my life I play it safe whereas others times I do take chances. I am pretty safe in my parenting choices, my career path and my financial decisions. Traveling is the one area that I love to take chances in. My daughters and I have went on short trips over their spring breaks, and I think that it even surprises them when I say that we have a destination but we will "fly by the seat of our pants" to arrive there. I love that feeling of freedom.  My dream would be to just get in the car and drive with a vague destination like California or Yellowstone in mind. I would drive until I see something that interests me and stop. I have a deep yearning to see the world, and would want the freedom to explore it all. I almo...

         What did Hermann Hesse mean by the quote, "Knowledge can be communicated but not wisdom"? Knowledge is facts, information and skills that a person can acquire from experience, and the definition of wisdom is the quality of having knowledge and experience. At first glance they do not seem that different, but as you break the definitions down you realize that others can teach you knowledge through their words and their actions. Wisdom seems to be your own interpretation of the knowledge that you are exposed to. It is your thoughts, feelings and responses to all that you learn, situations that you are in and circumstances that you encounter. Intelligence is a trait that most people are in awe of, but in many ways that is a talent or a God given gift. One's ability to learn knowledge is determined by drive and ability, yet wisdom is limitless. All people possess an infinite ability to gain wisdom from the life they are living. Read my words and see my...

                                          I am impressed with other people's talents whether it is in being great at a sport, singing songs, being an award winning actor or various other talents. I have always felt that I am "a jack of all trades but a master of none", meaning that I can do many things but have never been extraordinary at any. Having a gift or talent is something that you were born with or as some call it "god given". I do think that we all have some special gift or talent, but what sets those apart from others is that they realized their special ability and pursued it. That is what they should be proud of; that is what should be applauded. I hope that my daughters discover their gifts and pursue them with their whole heart and soul. At 49, I am still looking for mine.

        How true are Mark Twain's words, "I can live for two months on a good compliment"? When I started out as an early childhood educator in 2001, my Director was very knowledgeable and taught me well. In fact, I often hear her words in my head as I perform my job of taking care of infants. Like I said, she really knew her stuff, but she never complimented me. She felt that as working adults we should not need to hear praise from her. Fast forward a few years, to another Director I worked for. She would leave notes occasionally in the room complimenting something we did, or put a note in my mailbox saying she appreciated how hard I worked. She even now, keeps me in her thoughts when new opportunities for growth in this field come up because she knows and acknowledges how dedicated I am to Bright Horizons. Of course, I was a hard worker with the first Director, but which Director helped me to grow and be all that I can be? Which Director made me ...

          I have always been disappointed in myself for mistakes that I have made, although I have also tried to learn from them. I am a very introspective person and constantly devour articles and books that I believe will help in the evolution of my soul, but I am still saddened by some of the choices that I have made and mistakes of the past. If I could just remember what I learned instead of dwelling on the error of my ways, maybe I truly could master it and move on. To tie in a previous post, this can be something new that I will do this month. I forgive my mistakes, since they lead me to today.

         Although we can't change the things that we did in the past, we have the power to change the future. Too many people get stuck on the past, feeling like they are defined by it especially when people are young. As I near the age of 50, I have come to understand that one true fact about life is that everything changes. People change, styles change, friends change and even beliefs, hopes and wishes do. When I was younger, it was hard to imagine the future that I am living now. I have done things in my life and hurt people I love, but I know that I can learn from these things and make better choices and decisions. Hopefully, the people that I love will forgive me and know that we can all be different in the future.

          Sigmund Freud said, "Love and Work are the cornerstones of our humanness." The love doesn't need to be a romantic love, and the work doesn't have to be a career, but they are what gives our life purpose and meaning. I am lucky that my work also gives me both, love and purpose. I have been taking care of infants for more than 12 years now. I would never have thought that it was possible to love, so deeply, children that are not mine, but I do. I know that the love I feel will never run out; it just keeps coming with every new baby. I am not saying that I don't look forward to a day off or the end of my shift, but I love my babies. When I am on vacation, I wonder how they are. When they move to the toddler unit, I miss them every day. It truly is the best kind of work. I would agree that we need someone to love and something to do to be happy, no matter who you love or what you do, and I am grateful for both.

        When I set a goal or when my to do list gets too large, there are always excuses to make. I am too busy; I don't feel well; I am overwhelmed. Thomas Jefferson's quote states that with the right attitude, you can achieve your goals, but nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong attitude. Some days I wonder if I will achieve this goal of writing in my blog every day, but after reading this I know that I will achieve this goal. I will have a positive attitude, and I will deal with any challenges that come my way.

            The dictionary defines good as that which is morally right; righteous. Is that your definition of good? I strive to be an honest person, a kind person, a loving person, but is that a description of a "good" person? We see goodness in ourselves and in others, but is the label of goodness a judgment or a quality? I choose to be the qualities of  honest, loving, kind and fair but who decides what is good? Is a person good if they volunteer and help others, yet in their heart they dislike the ones they are helping? Or talk negatively about others? It is important to show goodness to the world, but have goodness in your heart as well.

        I work at an Early Childhood Center where consistency is very important. The infants thrive on consistent care givers, consistent playmates and a consistent schedule. Is consistency as important for adults? Oscar Wilde claims that "Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative." It states that change can help us be more flexible and open minded. In some ways, I am very open to change and new things. I love to travel to different places and explore new places to hike, but in other ways I like the tried and true. I order the same food from my favorite restaurants; I wear the same style and color of clothes and spend much of my free time reading, writing, watching movies or walking. I vow to use my imagination every month to think of something new I can try to have a little inconsistency in my life.

        Eric Hoffer said, "To become different from what we are, we must have some awareness of what we are." I agree that in order to grow, change and become a more evolved person, we should look at our behaviors closely. Others will look at a person and say that they are stubborn or lazy or any other description, but that person can't see that about themselves. It is difficult to look hard and accept the truth about our own faults, but that is truly the only way to change. I have always been a reactor. I am not confrontational so when others treat me bad or say mean things, I hold it in for too long and then explode. Numerous self help books claim that you can not control what others do; you can only control how you respond. I want that to be true about myself. I no longer want to just "react" to the people and circumstances of my life.  I want to change. Read my words and see my quotes at http://susanmarieschulhof.blogspot.com

          Making decisions in life, especially when it comes to your children, are difficult to make. I am always fearful of making the wrong decision, so sometimes I just avoid the issue. I will pray on it, talk to other's about it and do tarot card readings all in an attempt to be told what to do. Fear holds me back in many aspects of my life; even affecting decision making. Not choosing or feeling like you are not making a decision making is probably the worst action I could take. I promise myself today to be strong and face my fear of failure and making mistakes. Not choosing has lead me to many mistakes in my life already, so why not try choosing now?